THOMAS: It wasn’t all that long ago that shield sunglasses were a distant memory of the 80s and 90s, like the Walkman or the electric typewriter. Heck, I can still smell the coconut suntan oil that drenched the Santa Cruz surf shop where I first saw a pair of Oakley Blades. Those screens with multicolored reflective coatings seemed to magically float on your face, transforming ordinary dweebs like me into rad brahs with whom Jeff Spicoli would be stoked to share a righteous pie. The rub was that they’d set you back a hundred clams — at least.
A Benjamin was a shit ton of money back in the day, but I had to have my Blades. Looking back, I get why they kept ’em in a locked case. I would have gone for a five-finger discount if they’d been any more accessible. Instead, I had to squirrel away money like I was investing in a 401K.
As I saved, I imagined how cool I would look when I finally had them. Before long, that day came, and my biggest decision was which color to buy. I went to the surf shop and weighed my options, eventually landing on orange frames with a gold-to-red gradient shield. You might think — or at least I did — “Damn, the kid made it. Next stop, Coolsville, USA.”
In reality, eyewear alone isn’t enough to transform a pale, scrawny, half-Jewish kid with braces. Honestly, the Blades just amplified my dorkiness, so I left the shields to pro wrestlers and burnt-out surfers.
It would be almost 25 years before I would work up the nerve to wear another pair. Truth be told, I still can’t don them without a bit of self-consciousness, but as a runner, I can walk around in 3-inch shorts or tights, so who gives a shit what people think of my shades? Besides, the 80s are back in style.
Looks aside, shield sunglasses offer a couple of practical benefits. First, blade-style lenses are lightweight and provide wrap-around coverage. Second, sunglasses are essential for protecting your vision, duh.
As for the SunGod Ultras, need I say more than that you can customize each pair? You can make the Ultras fit your unique personality with ten frame color choices, ten different lenses, nine logo color options, and eight earsocks colors. Earsocks, for the uninitiated, are the rubber tips that cover the frame near your ear. I went through the process and created two pairs of Ultra sunglasses, which were delivered within a week.
The SunGod Ultras are right in line with what you’d expect from the $185 price tag. The lens clarity is crystal clear, and there wasn’t any fogging. Once the glasses were in place, I didn’t have any bouncing. The Ultra can handle the double duty of running and cycling and are a perfect choice for triathletes.
If I could write a letter to my past self, I’d tell him to save his clams on that pair of Oakley Blades. He didn’t know just how cool shields would become in the future. As Marty McFly told a confused gym in Back To The Future, “I guess you guys aren’t ready for that, yet. But your kids are gonna love it.” I’d also show him this picture…
